Skip to main content

Posts

Showing posts from 2019

Eyes of Shame; The power and potency of Eye Contact

Healing our psyche with Attuned Eye Contact Where do feelings of shame originate? What do we know about the power and potency of eye contact? as infants, with our mothers? as adults, with each other? with ourselves in a mirror? I discuss the significance of eye contact in our identity formation.  Points covered include: Mary Ayer's book: 'Mother-Infant Attachment & Psychoanalysis; The Eyes of Shame' the 'Mother Gaze'; how initial attunement with the infant affects the infant's sense of self worth skin shame and deep shame physiological and emotional regulation through attuned eye gazing mirror gazing the healing art of offering attuned eye contact to others What is your experience with shame? 

REACH OUT, AND RECEIVE SIMULTANEOUSLY?

Reach in, Reach Out, Be Touched What kind of healing, what kind of unguarded intimacy is available through attunement? My partner dance with K at Ecstatic Dance December 22. It's our third dance together. Our first dance focused on lifting, with me offering some teaching. The second dance was a combination of low to the ground dancing and a standing contact improv dance. As we concluded that second dance, K  said, "more". Which in this setting, meant, "let's dance together again, in future dances." Our third dance occurred yesterday, Sunday. We began dancing together toward the end of the Ecstatic Dance set. We 'randomly' found ourselves close to each other on the dance floor. It was about three fourths of the way into the dance event. Both of us were standing and we began with vertical dance partnering, in hand to hand contact. I became quite aware of the fact that K was moving in a way that kept missing the direct contact point, which

Who Pulls the Strings?

Did I just wake up in a state of panic because I’m at the mercy of life? Or is something else going on here?   I share a shift in my personal perspective that appears to be a game changer in terms of how I experience myself, and   approach my life.   Do I need 2 years on park benches to integrate?   Or was this an actual, core transformational experience? I don’t know. I’m excited to find out: I added a little clarification here.  What point of view am I focusing from? 

Self Talk - "Pay no attention to that Old Lady"

Are your inner voices serving you or limiting you? Watch how I notice, feel the impact, understand, empathize with, and then decide to dismiss that "Old Lady' talking at me.

Leaning into Discomfort

Where do we contract? What do we habitually do with feelings of discomfort? What if, instead of resisting, numbing out, and trying to escape our moments of discomfort, we embraced them instead? Expand your capacity to enter into the exquisiteness of Being with the practice I offer here.

ON WAITING

This installment explores Waiting. Is there value in waiting? How do we allow life to come to us, and be with what comes, regardless of its content, with equanimity, acceptance, and even joy? Part of the 'Being Seen Being' Series: Using presence as an avenue for self exploration and self-expression.

Celebrating my newest practice- path of least resistance

Grounded in my Guidance Open ❤️ Dancing Ecstatic Dance is Awesome! My new practice is: to remind myself that every one and every thing is on their path of least resistance. Their path of most allowing. Always moving in the direction of what they most want to be(come). MY business is: Attend to what I'm sensing, and keep my heart open and receptive. My business is: to stay-self-connected, grounded in my essential power My business is: to sense and move toward the "yes"      The "yes" which is self-affirming and oh so exquisite! My business is: to move toward the "ye"s in me, in you, in us, in the field. Let's dance our "Yes!"

How do we get to mutuality in intimacy?

First in a series of short, embodied demonstration videos teaching the principles of healthy relating: Tiffany & Harmony What would it be like to feel good in every moment of every relationship? To be fully present, centered strong, safe, open, and receptive? PRINCIPLES OF HEALTHY RELATING Sometimes it’s just hard, confusing or scary to   meet and try to get to know someone new. We can have feelings of overwhelm, confusion , awkwardness, disconnection, and even shame, as we try to negotiate the intricacies of connecting and relating.   Think about it, though. Every time have an encounter with another person, we must greet, meet, connect, interact, and complete.   How do we stay present and feeling good during each stage of this process? In this video we will break it down step-by-step. We offer some new languaging and bring in some new concepts. You will learn to feel, understand and differentiate the different intentions and energies for each stage of an e

Dance as a Relational Practice - Connecting on the Ecstatic Dance Floor

Sharing my insights on facilitating and enjoying spontaneous, dynamic interactive free-style and Contact Improvisation Dance MY BACKGROUND AND  CONTEXTUALIZING WHAT I'LL BE TALKING ABOUT : INTRO CONTINUED: MAPPING THE RELATIONAL INTERACTIONS: 2 POLARITIES;  4 ROLES DEEPER EXPLANATION OF THE 4 ROLES PRINCIPLES OF EFFECTIVE COACHING: 1. Going with their system 2. A safe environment is required for learning 3. Be what you are asking others to be/learn 4. Take the biggest risks WHAT PEOPLE NEED FIRST: TOUCH AND CONTACT IMPROVISATION HOW WE LEARN:

How do we show up in Groups?

It’s easy to conflate the idea of ‘group awareness’ with group conformity, or 'going along' with what a group is doing or believing. While maintaining an awareness of the larger group is desirable, and it may seem like a good idea to just go along, when we give up our individuality or autonomy in order to belong to a group, we’ve sacrificed any opportunity to offer our unique contributions. And it is these very unique contributions that enhance any group.   F rom my point of view, ‘group awareness’ does not mean 'group think' or 'herd mentality'. In fact, many awful things can happen when folks give up inner authority and thoughtlessly follow a herd mentality! What we are looking for is a way to include others, without disregarding our own energy, feelings, and needs.  I recently heard a delightful definition of 'harmony' or ‘harmonizing’. It was given in the context of musicality, but I think it beautifully describes how we can

SOFTENING INTO RECEPTIVITY

SOFTENING INTO RECEPTIVITY Softening is not collapsing. Softening is letting go of excess tension, excess resistance. Softening is letting go of urgency. Softening is letting go of control. Softening is listening and attending to the moment. It is allowing ourselves to become permeable. Softening opens us up to be receptive. To receive subtle impulses, to receive spontaneous impulses. Softening is waiting for impulses to arise, rather than making things happen. When we soften we become connected to ourselves. We become available to ourselves. We become available to others.   When we soften we feel ourselves as the center of our own flow, rather than feeling we are outside of the flow and trying to connect with it. When we soften, we slow down.   We savor. We perceive through our senses and sense with our hearts. We become alert and alive to the moment. We receive everything.   Softening is trusting. Trusting ourselves to just be in this moment. Completely. Soft

Softening into Receptivity

soften, listen, receive Softening is not collapsing. Softening is letting go of excess tension, excess resistance. Softening is letting go of urgency. Softening is listening and settling into the moment. It is allowing our senses to become permeable. Softening opens us up to be receptive. To receive impulses. To wait for impulses to arise, rather than making things happen.When we soften we become available to ourselves. We become connected to ourselves. We become the subject of our heart rather than the object of our mind. When we soften we feel we are the center of our own flow, rather than feeling outside of the flow, trying to connect with it.

Embodied Coaching - how does it work?

A beautiful testimonial from a client who received embodied coaching from me. In it she shares how her body senses and responds to very specific kinesthetic information I provide. Simply directing her focused attention to areas and sensations in her body, her energetic patterns are revealed to her conscious awareness.  This awareness alone is enough to spontaneously bring about radical changes in her psyche. Elena's Transformative experience with Embodied Coaching