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Showing posts with the label shame

Is My Voice Welcome Here?

-An inquiry into the deeper dynamics of human interaction. In this episode, I share a few experiences and insights about how structural power imbalances and inequalities influence our interactions with each other.   Thoughts on why we may feel hesitant to share our opinions, ideas and reflections verbally in social situations Suggestions for increasing the likelihood that we will experience satisfying verbal interactions with others.   One way we can co-create safe containers for satisfying interactions:   Agree on explicit yet flexible guidelines for our interaction. In advance.   In this way, we create a field of safety for spontaneous, dynamic,  mutually satisfying engagement to arise between and among individuals.   It is possible to: Address and level uneven power dynamics Minimize layers of separation Meet each other authentically, respectfully, and vulnerably, heart to heart Do you collude?   Sel...

Eyes of Shame; The power and potency of Eye Contact

Healing our psyche with Attuned Eye Contact Where do feelings of shame originate? What do we know about the power and potency of eye contact? as infants, with our mothers? as adults, with each other? with ourselves in a mirror? I discuss the significance of eye contact in our identity formation.  Points covered include: Mary Ayer's book: 'Mother-Infant Attachment & Psychoanalysis; The Eyes of Shame' the 'Mother Gaze'; how initial attunement with the infant affects the infant's sense of self worth skin shame and deep shame physiological and emotional regulation through attuned eye gazing mirror gazing the healing art of offering attuned eye contact to others What is your experience with shame?