Skip to main content



Recent posts

Touched by Tenderness; Tears

  Tears come when I'm touched by Tenderness And this is how I regulate and re-establish my balance: drawing & text by Harmony Gates


Where is your Attention Focused? How do you handle others' attention?   Taking charge of our own attentio n - is perhaps the greatest challenge of our times We are here to amplify each other with our attention. We are flow-ers of energy, self expressers. And when we look up and see someone is giving us their attention, we are amplified. Another’s attention is not meant for us to then objectify ourselves and try to see ourselves through their eyes , but rather to celebrate our own self as we are being ourself in this moment.   So let others' attention amplify you, rather than trap you into self- consciousness. Self-consciousness that others’ yourself, and has you begin thinking that, now you need to be some body or do something or change something , to please, to entertain, to perform, or to look at yourself, and attempt to evaluate yourself through their eyes .   Just celebrate the attention. Let it fill you up. Let it amplify you. Let it let you know how wonderful you a

What's YOUR calling?

  I woke up the other morning,   once again acutely aware of the fact that I was still searching for a TITLE for myself. One that fit my calling in this life. The title, or term ’Coach’ has always been an option, but has never been a clear fit for me. Adviser, consultant, mentor, teacher, trainer, hostess, facilitator… all these seem to hold an aspect of what I’m about. So I once again my mind suggested and toyed with all of these terms. But none seemed to feel just right. Just like in the story of The Three Bears , all these terms seemed too hot, too cold, too big, too small, too hard, or too soft. I didn’t want to settle until I found a title that felt, Just Right . And none of these comfortably fit me.   So once again I sat with some disappointment and frustration, unable to nail a title that I could sit inside of with complete contentment.   Accepting my failure with a deep sigh, I let go. I let go of the striving and surrendered. I dropped into a quiet stillness.   Then, to my su

Emotional Intimacy with Autonomy

  Does emotional intimacy require us to lose ourself ?  Just what allows us to experience Emotionally Secure Human Intimacy?   An aligned, stable, secure, yet open sense of our Self. A self that   is capable of meeting another with openness, warmth, understanding and   resonance.   It is that deep connection where we feel unguarded. Where we feel safe emotionally, and we trust that we are seen, held, and listened to with respect and care. And we want to be a Self that can embed with others. A self that perceives the feeling state, the experiential state of another, with understanding, caring and compassion.   We want to be able to be emotionally intimate, emotionally caring, emotional resonant, without losing connection with ourselves. And we want the capacity to care deeply about someone, without feeling responsible   to caretake them emotionally.   What may hold us back from this deep communion is our fear of becoming   enmeshed with another.   This is a condition where we lose our o

I'm the King of My Own Life

Monday’s with Mike Episode 39  IN THIS EPISODE: “I don’t feel like I’m the King of anything, except my own Life.” I shares thoughts about the movie Avatar -why I especially appreciated the film. I talk about my biological father’s death; what I felt at the time; how we can have feelings of grief and sadness, as well as celebration and appreciation seemingly simultaneously, or at least in close succession. Mike and I compare some aspects of Indigenous and modern western cultures, including:   what type of society does each create?   how would each view success?   how are children raised to become adults?   does our modern western style of upbringing help children become people who design their own lives?   I introduce Maria Montessori - her educational experiment with latchkey children in Italy that became the basis for the Montessori Method of early childhood education And what is meditation? is briefly explored. More episodes of Mondays with Mike

Being Embraced

A Description of Contact Improvisation Dance Practice: Achieving inner stillness through attention to, and acute observation of our impulses; our bodily experience. Meeting at the point of touch and exploring, through mutual responsiveness, what movement wants to unfold from an authentic, neutral space Curiously exploring that meeting, that point, that present moment, while maintaining full, unconditional presence. Saying, “YES!” in response to the other, without diminishing our self; without compromising our own authenticity. Surrendering to process, letting go of judgment, of intention, of willfulness. Experiencing a spaciousness that allows full acceptance self and other. As we are. Mutually supporting what is happening. And when there are ‘disconnects’, stopping and waiting. Waiting for that full presence to come into each of us again; for that felt sense of, “Ah yes, you are here, I am here, we meet here.” And in agreement, continuing. Joined, yet separate and individual. Connecti