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HEALING THE WOUND OF NON-SUPPORT

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TODAY'S INSIGHT: THINKING ABOUT

THINKING ABOUT Thinking, (words and language), About, instead of Being, (feeling, experiencing), removes me from my Self .   Sensations & emotions are Being; =experiencing. My Mind... the About   is all about determining right or wrong . ‘Should’ = self-torture “Just agree with Everything!” “I know what   I know .” Life is happening, And it keeps on happening,   there’s nothing we can do about it, but keep on riding that pony!   I am the Pony!

Touched by Tenderness; Tears

  Tears come when I'm touched by Tenderness And this is how I regulate and re-establish my balance: drawing & text by Harmony Gates

What's MY calling?

  I woke up the other morning,   once again acutely aware of the fact that I was still searching for a TITLE for myself. One that fit my calling in this life. The title, or term ’Coach’ has always been an option, but has never been a clear fit for me. Adviser, consultant, mentor, teacher, trainer, hostess, facilitator… all these seem to hold an aspect of what I’m about. So I once again my mind suggested and toyed with all of these terms. But none seemed to feel just right. Just like in the story of The Three Bears , all these terms seemed too hot, too cold, too big, too small, too hard, or too soft. I didn’t want to settle until I found a title that felt, Just Right . And none of these comfortably fit me.   So once again I sat with some disappointment and frustration, unable to nail a title that I could sit inside of with complete contentment.   Accepting my failure with a deep sigh, I let go. I let go of the striving and surrendered. I dropped into a quiet stillness.   Then, to my su

Emotional Intimacy with Autonomy

  Does emotional intimacy require us to lose ourself ?  Just what allows us to experience Emotionally Secure Human Intimacy?   An aligned, stable, secure, yet open sense of our Self. A self that   is capable of meeting another with openness, warmth, understanding and   resonance.   It is that deep connection where we feel unguarded. Where we feel safe emotionally, and we trust that we are seen, held, and listened to with respect and care. And we want to be a Self that can empathize with others. A self that perceives the feeling state, the experiential state of another, with understanding, caring and compassion.   We want to be able to be emotionally intimate, emotionally caring, emotional resonant, without losing connection with ourselves. And we want the capacity to care deeply about someone, without feeling responsible   to caretake them emotionally.   What may hold us back from this deep communion is our fear of becoming   enmeshed with another.   This is a condition where we lose o

Being Embraced

A Description of Contact Improvisation Dance Practice: Achieving inner stillness through attention to, and acute observation of our impulses; our bodily experience. Meeting at the point of touch and exploring, through mutual responsiveness, what movement wants to unfold from an authentic, neutral space Curiously exploring that meeting, that point, that present moment, while maintaining full, unconditional presence. Saying, “YES!” in response to the other, without diminishing our self; without compromising our own authenticity. Surrendering to process, letting go of judgment, of intention, of willfulness. Experiencing a spaciousness that allows full acceptance self and other. As we are. Mutually supporting what is happening. And when there are ‘disconnects’, stopping and waiting. Waiting for that full presence to come into each of us again; for that felt sense of, “Ah yes, you are here, I am here, we meet here.” And in agreement, continuing. Joined, yet separate and individual. Connecti

Believing that we don’t Matter

Mondays with Mike Episode  36   How painful and self-separated we feel when we are believing that we don’t  matter. This is an emotional session for me, Harmony.   I go slow and deep, not just talking about painful emotions, but actually experiencing them in the moment, within the safety of MIke’s caring. He accompanies me with warmth and resonance.   And With this support, I find the safety and holding I need in order to express, grieve, process, and experience resolution The camera was accidentally set to capture only Mike’s presence on the video.   But maybe this was actually providential, because we get to see just how Mike shows his caring attentiveness, which signals to me that he is friendly empathic ally, and enables me to share my raw self so openly and vulnerably.