How to handle (unsolicited) advice

How can you handle (unsolicited) advice with care and compassion for the giver, and receive instead the active listening you want instead?

Watch to hear more about why we give advice, what we really want, and how to be of greater support to yourself and to others as you look for guidance.

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A Special Dance

by Harmony Gates I was lying on my back in the center of the room. The music was slow the lights were low. A ritual preparation. Tuning in: to the room, to the music, to my body. He rolled up to me slowly… deliberately, I thought, and peered down at me; head cocked to the left, mouth slightly open, teeth slightly showing. I'd had this happen before; another day, another dance. He'd rolled up next to me, peering in my direction. I'd offered to connect, and he'd rolled right on past. But this time felt different. He stopped. I waited. He looked. I held his gaze. My right arm was outstretched hand open, reaching in slow motion. Inviting, offering, waiting. Wanting nothing, allowing everything. As if called forth-- his left arm, pinioned to his chest like an unfurled wing, began to extend. His hand, claw-like in it's spastic contraction met mine With incredible power and strength he closed his

Being Embraced

A Description of Contact Improvisation Dance Practice: Achieving inner stillness through attention to, and acute observation of our impulses; our bodily experience. Meeting at the point of touch and exploring, through mutual responsiveness, what movement wants to unfold from an authentic, neutral space Curiously exploring that meeting, that point, that present moment, while maintaining full, unconditional presence. Saying, “YES!” in response to the other, without diminishing our self; without compromising our own authenticity. Surrendering to process, letting go of judgment, of intention, of willfulness. Experiencing a spaciousness that allows full acceptance self and other. As we are. Mutually supporting what is happening. And when there are ‘disconnects’, stopping and waiting. Waiting for that full presence to come into each of us again; for that felt sense of, “Ah yes, you are here, I am here, we meet here.” And in agreement, continuing. Joined, yet separate and individual. Connecti

HEALING THE WOUND OF NON-SUPPORT

We must receive support before we can ever give it Many of us were born and raised in homes where we did not receive the support we really needed in order to feel safe, seen, grounded, and valued. For whatever reasons, our parents and families and perhaps even our communities were unable to give us enough responsive attention for us to anchor a feeling of being empowered and supported into our Beings. Because we did not receive this support for our very Being, our essence, we came to distrust ourselves and those around us. We became unable to receive support, even when it was sincerely offered. We came to feel that we were a burden and that we didn’t deserve to have support or feel supported. We tried to make it through our lives by being totally self-sufficient. Since we couldn’t receive support, we reasoned, maybe we didn’t need it. We managed for quite some time in this way. But we found that we were unable to feel totally at ease with ourselves and our lives. And we found

Radical Aliveness

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